just in time for FHE...

Dear family,
It's good that I now have a platform for speaking to all of you directly. And since this is Monday night...

"WELCOME TO FAMILY NIGHT!!! IS THERE ANY BUSINESS???"

"Russ and Doug have been fighting..." (I remember the comment, but I don't remember the fighting ;-)
"OK, any other business? If not, Russ will lead us in our opening song."
"But it's not my turn. The hearts on the chart never got moved after last week."
"Yes, they did get moved, but they fell off and were put back on in the wrong spots."
"OK, OK. Let's have our lesson now."
"Since Doug doesn't have a lesson prepared, Dad would like to share a few thoughts on how important it is that we do all we can to live all the (psst! Mom, wake up!) principles of the Gospel. Kids, this shouldn't take very long, so (psst! Mom, wake up!) I appreciate you all sitting there patiently while I expound (psst! Mom, wake up!) on the many wonderful and beautiful facets of the Gospel...
(two hours later)
and in conclusion (sniff-sniff), I hope you will (sniff-sniff) all remember (sniff-sniff) to live all the principles of the Gospel. (OK, Mom, Dad's done talking so you can wake up now.)
"OK, for our activity tonight we will run and jump over Dad's arm and fall onto some pillows, and then we will walk on Dad's back."
And that's the way it was... (well, lots of times anyway. Actually the best FHEs were the ones that Mom took charge of and planned out for us)